Sometimes in silence, I reflect on love.
Love that I have, and, love that is gone.
What is gone often seems very close,
While what I have seems distant and cold.
As I sat surveying the hill side,
I stroked the grass and softly kissed it.
I unwrapped the dark chocolate that
I was carrying, and, paused to take a bite.
I could faintly smell the lavender from my fading perfume,
Creating a heady concoction with the surrounding sage and thyme bushes growing in profusion.
I touched the blue sky in my mind’s eye and thought harder.
In the name of Love, we give it infinite power To evoke hidden desires, our deepest scars and oldest longings.
Rewind, erase, let go and pause again. Repeat.
I lost track of time.
Bugle sounds from the army camp at the base of the terraced valley broke my reverie.
I stretched my limbs and knew it down to my bones that
Stealing a slice of time is never as nice as living it.
When we climb, we seek as to why, somewhere between the bottom and the summit.
Love is a bit like that too.
Caught struggling forever between the anticipation of a kiss, and its consummation.
With softened eyes and nerves of steel,
I rose and walked back to the car,
Having known now through many lifetimes
That self love is the best gift that I can ever give myself.